Grieving during Quarantine

Swapna di passed away. She didn’t succumb to the virus but her passage during the quarantine was even more poignant because so many were constrained from attending her funeral services. Some like me were daunted by the state of New Jersey’s mandatory social distancing guidelines and the curfew in the evening. So we condoled and mourned electronically. This is the new norm until this pandemic passes. And yet in the midst of all this fear and anxiety, Pronoy da’s calm equanimity is a lesson for me.

The Romans taught us stoicism, but even before that the Vedic rishis exemplified the concept of Sthitadhi. Lord Krishna  guided Arjuna to adopt this mindscape in the battlefield of Kurukshetra. But in the face of adversity, loss and personal grief, it is so easy to fall from this ideal. You are only human and so you give in to the human weaknesses. So when someone defies human frailty and elevates himself above the normal human emotions despite the load of sadness and sorrow, he is someone we look up to and emulate.

Even after losing the love of his partner for the last five decades or more, and  having seen her combat physical trauma, Pronoy da can still think of a beautiful love song “Pronoy tomar michhe noy.” How uplifting is that, you wonder. The soul is steeped in love for humanity at a level way beyond personal loss: altruistic and benign. Pronoy da has so much to give and teach us yet. A wise soul is a privilege for us to have around. We are grateful to you.

We all have our personal battles with sickness and sorrow at different points in our lives. But it’s how we face them is what decides the outcome. Pronoy da has continued to amaze me with his resilience and true grit while fighting his own battles. This has motivated me to face my own personal challenges without complaining much. Acceptance is an immensely helpful tool. It enables you to be humble and open, amplifying your mind rather than constricting it. In that state of being we end up helping ourselves and more importantly helping others. That is a very liberating feeling. It is up to us how we nurture this one life of ours to beautify and sublimate it and that of  many others.